venus

cannibales script: it’s finally on track. not done by any means. well, it is technically written even if we haven’t decided to put it into any sort of order. i wrote it in three tonally dissonant sprints and it’s nice! i keep saying things about the main character and adding in random details like putting in the saying [藕斷絲連] as the endscreen or somewhere in there as well as a lotus somewhere and m says we’ll eventually have to make the actress asian but the potential actress we have now is indian. but she’s leaving the city in february to go to, i think, italy? so it needs to be done soon. mostly i’ve done my part as the writer but i just need to organise it together into some type of structure and then i can be pushy abt getting production on a schedule. i really would love a drone shot of the actress floating in a pond - less ophelia and more carcass downstream. there is a line in there that is horrifically american and i need to change it. i looked up potential substitutes and now i need to lock in to read a textbook edited by karel vasak that i will not be able to read this year but is very interesting nonetheless. there are some parts i dislike about what i’ve written but the better part of this process is that the short is limited and we’ll only be able to use some of it so i can use the best of it. also this is probably a creative friendship/partnership? and we have something else to work on after this which is extremely fun and would make going to cons #field_research but we just need to get cannibales on the road. i’m intensely gratified i got chosen/conscripted into this because of my tendency to write absolutely miserable things almost all of the time. i just want to see a guy cosplay miku and investigate a [REDACTED]. yes i know there are many guys who cosplay miku but it's not the same however if im still a student then i could get a free plane ticket to see m. so i should do that graduate certificate. that’s if i’m not employed in a specific way.

EVENT.jpoe: this is because i watched strange aeons’ dashcon 2 video and realised i do like doing events even though i fully crashed out badly after doing the launches last year. i just needed r&r (a lie, i have been working constantly) to not be so tightly wound about all of it. i have some preliminary data about things but not a lot. it has been done in my city and more than a handful in the past year. so! need to set up a meeting with a marketing specialist who did four of the promos last year. smiley face. i have a friend who works at an arts festival specifically in philanthropy which is very fun! and i have some friends who’ll chip in to help out. part of doing events like this is being plugged into the scene and it’s weird to realise that i am! i can probably get around fifteen people to table, easy, and getting a location is…..like i could go easy mode and do it on campus but that’s not exactly the vibe…..there’s a specific venue i need to contact and also just, you know, talk to people who’ve run similar events.

>80k.pdf: this is mostly so i can finally realise more lesbians who are in complicated nasty dynamics. but also so i can finally be done with it. i think i need a spreadsheet to track stuff and also be done with writing a book. i’m really interested in little useless and relatively benign loopholes in law. that and how governments exist and the whole thing of the pantomime of fae. i’m less interested in the…….. apparent sexual gimmick of fae? i know that paranormal romances have gained purchase in recent memory but that’s really not the bit i’m going for. i’m fascinated by fateswap and making objectively shitty decisions and then realising, oh yeah, consequences. that and the meaning of art for someone. i read wellness by nathan hill and was bored silly by the superficial engagement with sociology and its intersection with pop culture art. i liked frances cha’s distillation and engagement with art through miho’s character but ultimately found the resultant artwork…..not disappointing but without the life you’d expect to be imbued in the conclusion. herbert’s ‘tell them i said no’ was in a completely different direction than i expected. it was an abject refusal that i found…..sad. some of the beautiful prose reminded me of babitz’s lush description of life outside of la in ‘slow days, fast company’. especially the days spent languishing in the house in the desert where everyone was miserable. i also should do a roundup of the books i read this year.

i think i go a bit mad without having something to do or devote my time and attention to. i’ve mitigated it somewhat for most of the year with reading books and finishing my degree and, unplanned, getting kicked in the face for four months. i’ve read forty-two books and i’ve done my degree and am no longer getting kicked in the face which is a marked improvement. so i have a lot of time and not an absolute 9-5 to adhere to but i do have a contract locked in for the foreseeable future. it is a few months away and i do have fits of nervousness that i quell with reminders that i can leave and work is not the end all be all of things. if this is all a bit jumbly and all over the place, well, this is because i’m ill and finally ate soup and have enough energy to write and not be intensely self-conscious about it. perfection is the enemy of done.

OH. right. yes the final one

50bookszine: as i’ve mentioned, i’ve read an amount of books this year and it’s because i wanted to read fifty books this year. i’ve done 42/50 so far which is nice smileyface.jpeg. i want to remember it outside of a spreadsheet and it’s a nice…i don’t know, return to form for myself personally. i’m done with my degree and now i don’t want my brain to rust and shrivel with nothing but blot and rot so i’ve done a bit more reading. i’m still reading plenty of dreck and rotten work but i want to make it into something, you know. even if it’s just for me and three of my, no, make that four friends i’ll force to read it. i can probably bump that up to nine including past vollies-turned-friends. i’ll do this one basically when i’m done with reading eight more books which should be sometime in december.